Most parents don’t want their children to be spoiled. When we think about the word “spoiled” what does it mean? I think we usually attribute this characteristic to children who have everything they want….we consider them “spoiled”.
It has such a negative connotation. It also attributes this negative characteristic to the person who didn’t have an active part in the situation. I mean, after all….isn’t it the parent or grandparent who spoiled the child? I mean the child was simply a receiver of gifts.
I think most of us, if we were honest would say we wish we had everything we wanted. Why then do we withhold from our children in an effort to save them from being “spoiled”? I just don’t understand it.
Let’s look at this from a Christian standpoint. We ask our Heavenly Father for blessings, we don’t get everything we want, but we want them. God doesn’t withhold blessings from us. He sometimes doesn’t give us what we ask for because he is keeping us from danger, or saving us for something better, or maybe we aren’t mature enough for what we are asking for and He doesn’t say “no”, but is waiting for us to mature.
What if we took that same approach with our children? What if we decided we would give our children everything they wanted provided it wouldn’t hurt them. Basically, don’t give your 14 year old a brand new car because they can’t drive yet. You still have to exercise wisdom when deciding what to give them.
If your 11 year old wants to go to Paris for her birthday and you can afford to take her……take her…”spoil” her.
If your son wants a flat screen TV and you can afford it…go out and get it.
Just stay with me here…..
You should and can still teach them to be grateful, to be thankful and to responsible with what they are given. You can teach them where their true worth comes from and what it means to be content…….and still “spoil” them.
Don’t you feel a little like a hypocrite when you ask God for big things and then turn around and deny your children?
I didn’t always feel this way, this is something God has revealed to me recently. I found myself saying “no” to things I could say “yes” to just for the sake of saying “no”. I don’t want to “spoil” them, I don’t want them to be ungrateful.
Truth be told, I was praying and believing God for big things in my life, not for necessities. I was asking for an overflow of blessing above and beyond not only what I needed, but beyond my imagination as well. He wants to bless us that way too. His word says so.
Isn’t God our standard for the type of parents we should be? If God blesses us that way, why shouldn’t we bless our children in the same manner?
I want to be clear here…don’t foolishly spend your money on things you can’t afford or on things your child isn’t ready to have. Be wise, but be generous when you can.
I have made the decision to basically spoil my children. I am going to “spoil” them rotten…..as they say.
Maybe it’s easier to accept if I say I will be as generous as I can with my children. I am often on the receiving end of God’s generosity. I know I can never out-give God, but I can give with the same Spirit that lives in me.
The bible says God will not keep any good thing from me. I will no longer live in hypocrisy. I will not keep any good thing from my children either.
I believe because we following God in this generosity to our children they will actually become more grateful. It might also be easier for them to accept God’s love for them. I mean think about it…..If their parent who sees them and loves them withholds good things just because…why would they believe there is a God (they’ve never seen) who loves them that way?
I am not only going to bless my children…I plan to bless my king (my husband) also.
What do you choose?